Criticism hurts: Monkey feels ashamed
Complex unpleasant emotions: SHAME
| Author | Tatjana Gjurković, Tea Knežević |
|---|---|
| Illustrator | Jelena Brezovec |
| Original Title | Kritika boli: Majmunica se osjeća posramljeno |
| ISBN | 978-953-8008-83-2 |
| Format | softcover |
| Pages | 24 |
| Size | 22x22 cm |
| Age range | Early learning (2 – 6), Beginning readers (5 – 7) |
| Category | Shame |
|---|---|
| Tag | Complex unpleasant emotions |
WRITTEN BY EXPERTS IN CHILD PSYCHOLOGY
Little monkey went to the forest cinema to watch a cartoon with her mother. Her friends also came to the cinema with their parents. While they were waiting for the movie to begin, little monkey became so excited and impatient she couldn’t remain calm in her seat. She was restless and full of energy. In one moment, her mum had enough and started to criticise little monkey’s behaviour in front of everyone. Little monkey felt ashamed and embarrassed.
Many children are shy, or afraid of acting in front of others. However, the shame or embarrassment we are talking about in this picture book is a much more unpleasant feeling that makes a child (as well as adults) feel inadequate and wrong at the level of characteristics or identity.
Shame is one of the so-called complex emotions, and some also call it a social emotion because the function of shame is to make it easier for us to live together with others and integrate into society.
Like the feeling of guilt, children will most often feel shame when they receive criticism from parents and authorities, but they don’t experience this criticism as a criticism of their behaviour, but of themselves as a person. A child who is embarrassed by adults will interpret this emotion as if something is wrong with them as a person, that they are wrong, bad, and that there is nothing they can do to change it, which leads to a feeling of helplessness.
Shame in childhood seriously undermines the sense of personal value, or self-esteem, and can have strong long-term consequences in adulthood. Criticism is a technique used to discourage a child from unwanted behaviour, and it’s necessary, but it is extremely important that parents know the clear difference between criticizing the child’s behaviour and the child as a person – which is very harmful.
At the end of the picture book, there are advice for parents and adults on how to better manage their child’s behaviour and how to help them deal with the emotion of shame.
Author: Tatjana Gjurković
Tatjana Gjurković has a master’s degree in psychology, she is certified psychotherapist, certified child play therapist (RPT), Certified Transactional Analyst (CTA), Teacher and Supervisor of Transactional Analysis (TSTA). She works individually with children and adults and holds educational programs for specialists in fields of child play therapy and transaction analysis. She is author of a book “Play Therapy with children” and 28 therapeutic picture books. She continuously promotes the importance of mental health in children and adults through Centar Proventus which she co-founded with her colleague Tea Knežević.
Author: Tea Knežević
Tea Knežević has master’s degree in psychology, she is certified psychotherapist, certified child play therapist (RPT) and Certified Transactional Analyst (CTA). She provides play therapy with children, psychotherapy with adults, parent consultations, and conducts numerous training courses for professionals in Centar Proventus which she co-founded with her colleague Tatjana Gjurković. She has written 28 picture books with therapeutic stories for children. In addition, she is the author of several manuals related to psychological resilience, gifted children, and anger management.
Illustrator: Jelena Brezovec
Jelena Brezovec has a master’s degree in social studies. For a long time, drawing was just a hobby, until 2008 when she became a co-founder of the publishing house Evenio and decided to study digital illustration, with the focus on children’s illustration. So far, she has illustrated more than 40 picture books and many other publications. She is the winner of the Grigor Vitez “Bird” Award, a special praise from the children’s jury. She has illustrated the most popular children’s book series in Croatia – Mrljek & Prljek. Her illustrations have been part of many exhibitions throughout Croatia. She lives and works in Varaždin, Croatia.
